Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Graduations

Graduation season with all its fanfare has come and gone.

Now when and where I grew up there was only one graduation ceremony: the high school graduation ceremony. At the end of middle school, I believe that there was an awards ceremony and dessert. And, at the end of elementary school, there was a class party. And, I can't really speak to pre-school, because few if any students in my hometown attended pre-school or nursery, and I highly doubt there was any fanfare upon "graduation."

There was only one opportunity (before college) to dress up in Robes, Mortarboards, tassels, and ropes and walk down the aisle to music in front of family and friends to Pomp and Circumstance, or some other chosen music.

Recently, I have been introduced to a myriad of graduation ceremonies, ranging from the pre-school graduation through the high school graduation. Since I had never heard of such a thing as a pre-school or elementary school graduation, my interest was peaked. And, when we were invited to a Yeshiva elementary school graduation that was being held in a beautiful synagogue, I jumped on the opportunity to attend. (My husband was still at work at 2PM or 3PM in the afternoon, so I went stagg. Well, actually, I went stroller in tow).

I'm not sure what I expected to happen at an elementary graduation. Somehow I did not expect elementary school "graduates" to be wearing the full graduate regalia and to flip their tassel from one side to another. I guess I will have to add graduation robes, to be worn once, to our household budget. Anyone know how much this will run me?

Truth be told, I didn't know companies manufactured gowns in those sizes, or that there was such a market for gowns for elementary school graduations. When I was in high school, I was one of the shorter students. Let's just say it wasn't too easy to find a gown short enough for little me. (Let's just say short Jewish kids weighing around 100 pounds were a small minority in my school that fielded one of the top football teams in the state). I believe the rental gown company ($17 rental) ended up calling their headquarters to have an extra gown shipped special. I wasn't too happy that my $17 check ended up landing me a robe with a few small holes in it. But, at least we didn't have to buy a gown that would never, ever be worn again (the color was hideous, incidentally).

For a while I assumed that elementary and middle school graduations must be something introduced into Jewish schools, for whatever reason, since I had never heard of such a thing. . . Until I started asking around to some non-Jewish kids that I know and work with. Apparently, the graduation business has really bloomed and full scale ceremonies for all ages are the norm, at least where I live. What a surprise! I'm not that old. But, times change quickly.

My personal opinion is that middle school and elementary school graduations (kol v'chomer pre-school graduations) are not necessary and that there is no real need to celebrate, in such a grand fashion, what should be expected. Does anyone expect their child not to graduate pre-school, or elementary school?

It seems to me that when we celebrate what should be expected, it just diminishes real accomplishments. I believe an awards ceremony followed by a dessert would suffice just fine for younger children and that the fanfare should be saved for events that are more significant in the scheme of things.

But, in the meantime, I will just make sure to budget graduation robes and motarboards into the household budget. Let's just hope that nobody decides, in the meantime, that elementary and middle school grads need class rings, professional photos, or other graduation mementos. At least I don't have to worry about a pre-school prom!

So, what does the readership think?

11 comments:

mother in israel said...

My daughter just graduated from sixth grade. Let's see, we had to buy a class t-shirt, and had to pay for one parent to travel with her to Jerusalem for a class trip after the ceremony. They performed a few dances. Oh, and she needed black clothes, which I uncharacteristically went out and bought. She needed more clothes anyway. All in all, quite bearable. No mortarboard.

Anonymous said...

This isn;t really new. I graduated from a yeshiva elementary school 30 years ago and we had the full graduation with the robes and the trips etc. Actually it is very nice -- kids spend the longest part of their school life in elementary school (k-8) so it is very exciting for them to move on. By the time they get to high school some kids are more cynical and many people choose to skip their college graduation ceremonies since the schools are usually bigger and they have not formed the attachment to the school.

Ezzie said...

Both my high school and elementary school graduations were formal events - but that means we wore our normal Shabbos suits. I don't recall spending money on either, though my parents did travel to my high school graduation. My HS actually makes an entire "Senior Shabbos" for everyone to spend together with whatever family members wish to attend. I *think* they charge $50/head for the entire weekend, which really isn't terrible.

Abacaxi Mamao said...

I graduated from kindergarten, 12th grade, and college. I think we had paper mortorboard hats for kindergarten, and wore white and blue or something. I think it was nice to celebrate finishing kindergarten, since 1st grade seemed very daunting at the time (even though it was in the same school). I don't like awards ceremonies because they single individuals out. At least with graduations, everyone is treated equally (until they start giving out awards) and dressed similarly. It creates a feeling of equality and cohesion.

Anonymous said...

I think my grandson looked absolutely adorable in his "cap and gown" at his pre-1A (i.e. kindergarten) graduation last month.

Kiwi the Geek said...

It seems to me that when we celebrate what should be expected, it just diminishes real accomplishments.

I agree totally! A children's 'graduation' with handmade mortarboards would be cute if it were unusual. When everybody's doing it, it just seems silly.

Celebrations are great though, and could take as many forms as there are people to plan them. And an awards ceremony could easily award everybody, for different things: personal traits, special projects, community service, etc.

Anonymous said...

The Kindergarten graduations and elementary school graduations are nice lifestyle events, bringing people together. They make most people happy and harm nobody.
The award cereminies are a different issue. You want to enorage peoples successes, so If everybody gets an award, it becomes meaningless for everybody. Some poeple may not get ana ward, but are thanked for helping with the scenary, doing a special mitzvah, etc.

Orthonomics said...

BobF-I could not agree with you more about awards ceremonies. Awards need to recognize achievement. As soon as you give too many awards, it becomes meaningless to receive one.

On top of that, sometimes teachers have to look so hard to find a place that they can award a student, that they end up degrading the student by awarding them for something that is not even worthy of mention.

Orthonomics said...

The Kindergarten graduations and elementary school graduations are nice lifestyle events, bringing people together.

BTW-I have no problem bringing parents and students together at the year end for kindergarten, elementary, or middle school, in a different format. But, somehow, having an elementary school graduation with all the trimmings (gowns, mortarboards, music, a hall, student speakers, etc) takes away from the bigger forthcoming HS graduation.

To me, it is maybe a bit like throwing a Chatunah for a Bar Mitzvah.

Kiwi the Geek said...

Regarding awards ceremonies: too many awards are meaningless only if they're all the same award. We all have different strengths, and God is pleased with each of us when we make our best effort in the area he's given us talents.

If a teacher has to try so hard to find something worth awarding, I would suggest that either they're focused only on academic awards, or that the student isn't working very hard and doesn't deserve an award. This is quite common in public schools, which I have experience with, but I expect it would be less common in small private schools.

Personally, I don't have a problem with award ceremonies that recognize only a few. Parents need to praise their kids for doing what they do best, and teach them God made us different and he loves us that way. But if people have a problem with the disparity, widening the variety of awards would be a solution.

Scraps said...

When I was in kindergarten, we had a show for the parents at the end of the year. No ceremonies or robes or anything, but I think there were refreshments afterwards. At the end of elementary and middle school I had graduations (one from a Jewish school, one not), but again, they were sans full regalia. We just had to be presentable-looking. Only at the end of high school and college did I have a graduation with a cap and gown.